


A Lesson in Etiquette

by Madtom_Publius



Series: Valley Forge [10]
Category: 18th Century CE RPF, American Revolution RPF
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-31
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-07-11 07:12:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7035283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madtom_Publius/pseuds/Madtom_Publius
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Laurens and Lafayette find Hamilton wasting his night on dispatches and decide to put a stop to it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Lesson in Etiquette

**Author's Note:**

> Originally post on tumblr by publius-esquire

By the time Laurens managed to drag the Marquis away from the dinner table - or more specifically the wine - Lafayette and he were fairly more than a touch spirited. Thus they gasped in mortification at seeing the other member of their trio hunched over a desk across from his cot. Hamilton’s feet were tapping nervously and he muttered under his breath as he wrote furiously against the backdrop of a dimming candlelight. He had hardly registered his comrades’ presences until they practically stumbled on top of him. 

Lafayette looked at the correspondence and groaned. “Ah. This is why you left our company so early this evening? In France, it is considered most impolite to abandon one’s guests for work!” Even against the candlelight, his hazel eyes shone brightly, and the flush on his cheeks highlighted his faint freckles.

Not stopping his work for a moment, Alexander quipped, “My dear Marquis, as you’ve surely observed by now, we are not in the lands of His Most Catholic Majesty.”

“I should say not,” Gilbert interrupted with a smile, wrapping his arm around John’s shoulders. “If we were to be in France, the wine would be not so without taste.”

“He criticized the drinks throughout the entire dinner,” Laurens explained to Hamilton, who still had not lifted his head from his papers. “And yet he kept drinking, all the same.”

Lafayette exclaimed, gesticulating wildly, “In France, it is also discourteous to refuse the wine offered to one!”

“The French are undoubtedly the most gracious people to walk the earth,” proclaimed Alexander, rolling his eyes.

Blinking inquisitively at Alexander, as if trying to make sense of his words through the filter of alcohol, Gilbert shook his head before looking to John for explanation. “Is he speaking sarcasm?”

“Of course not,” Hamilton answered, the drollness practically flowing from his tongue.

Laurens tried to suppress a smile when Gilbert continued to look between them, confusion still etched across his sweet smile. But he could not keep his dear Marquis in the dark too long. To do so would be cruel. “I believe Colonel Hamilton has taken unfair advantage of the barrier between languages. Yes, mon ami, his wit is quite dry at the moment.”

“Ah. Then he is being most rude!”

Hamilton could hardly contain his own grin at the exaggerated offense in Lafayette’s voice, but he collected himself and focused on the documents Washington had requested he finish that night. He mustn’t let himself become distracted by his friends’ spirited shenanigans. 

The spirited flush in his cheeks deepening, John’s smile widened and he gestured helplessly to the man in the chair. “He’s not even the least apologetic for his ungentlemanly conduct. What are we to do with him, Gilbert?”

“You both are to go about your business,” Alexander answered again, dipping his pen in the inkwell. “Being the favored sons to His Excellency that you are, my work may seem menial, but as it won’t be you who faces a stern rebuke if these papers are not completed, you must leave those of us more unfortunate to our miserable lot.”

As Hamilton made his little speech, Laurens silently motioned instructions to Lafayette, and before the Little Lion knew what was happening, he was under attack. Lightning quick - surprising, considering their inebriated state - John’s arms were wrapped around his ribs and lifting him from the chair. Gilbert joined in the abduction, grabbing the flailing legs as they kicked wildly in the air.

“Put me down, you villains! Mutiny!” Alexander tried twisting and turning, but his captors kept their firm hold and dragged him away from his work until they unceremoniously plopped him onto the cot. “Really now,” he protested, “you’re keeping me away from very important duties with your nons-oof!”

The wind was knocked out of him as Lafayette sat on top of his gut. Before he could think to escape, Laurens lied on the cot beside him to cut off his only route to freedom. “Do you retract your insult?” he asked, unable to withhold his laughter at the miserable sight of his dear boy squirming under the Frenchman. “You have grossly hurt the feelings of our most honored guest. What do you have to say in your defense?”

“Get off me!” Alexander demanded, pushing against the lanky frame that was giggling madly on his stomach.

Gilbert’s grin covered the entirety of his face, which had reddened completely from the flush. “I am sorry,” he said, “but you know my English is not yet perfected.”

Hamilton pushed harder, but to no avail. “I said get off! This is hardly becoming of a civilized man such as yourself, Marquis! I would have expected better from you.” When Lafayette simply turned to Laurens and shrugged, as if he didn’t understand a word coming from his mouth, Alexander groaned helplessly. “Clearly you have spent too much time in the company of Colonel Laurens. He has taught you the unseemly habits of the Americans.”

Propping himself on his elbow, John raised his eyebrows and smirked at Gilbert. “He’s ticklish too, you know.” By the time Lafayette and Laurens were finished with Hamilton, and relented their vengeance at last, he was a sobbing and laughing mess, begging for mercy and vowing his own retaliation should Washington reprimand him for the unfinished dispatches in the morning. After all, he knew where they slept.


End file.
